Alright, let's dive into the depths of the cinematic sea and roast "Aquaman 2," a movie that might have you wishing you could breathe underwater—just so you can escape the theater!
First up, we have the plot—oh wait, was there one? The storyline in "Aquaman 2" swims about as smoothly as a penguin trying to fly. It's a whirlpool of recycled ideas that even the Trident of Poseidon couldn't salvage. And the pacing? It’s like watching seaweed grow—interesting to a sea slug, perhaps.
Now, on to the special effects. They must've thought "more is more," right? Every scene is so saturated with CGI that you start to wonder if even the popcorn is computer-generated. The visuals are so overwhelming it’s like being caught in a tsunami, minus the thrill.
And let's talk about character development—or the lack thereof. Characters float in and out with about as much depth as a kiddie pool. Our hero, Aquaman, spends so much time flexing his muscles, you’d think the movie was a two-hour gym advertisement.
As for the villains, they're about as intimidating as a soaked cat. Their evil plans are as clear as mud, and their threat level is just a notch above a jellyfish's sting.
To sum it up, watching "Aquaman 2" is like going on a deep-sea expedition where the most exciting discovery is finding out there’s still popcorn left at the bottom of the bucket. But hey, at least it gives new meaning to the term “sunk cost”!